Chicken and Biscuits

Today was Mrs. Koblitz's service and burial. For anyone that hasn't been to a funeral of someone terribly close to them, the service and burial are the worst! You would think it would be the other way around but it's not. Church can be so depressing. It's sad that now when I hear church music I think of funerals. I grew up in the catholic church. Sorry Jesus. Anyway the service was pretty hard. It reminded me a ton of my dad's. The priest even mentioned his name a couple times. Which was nice, but not. There were a couple of points during the service that I thought I was going to lose it. A word of advice, if you think you're going to lose it and you don't want to, think of something weird. That's what I did. I repeated over and over in my head "Chicken and Biscuits." I know, I know. I'm really really random. But it helped. Then that evolved to "chicken and waffles" and "wally wally world" soon I forgot where I was and wondered why I was repeating wally ringwold in my head. Then I smiled at how ridiculous I am. I have to do these kind of things a lot to keep my self sane. Anytime I saw Judy trying not to cry, I cried. At one point one Mrs. Koblitz's young grandson's started crying and put his had over his face!!! How heartbreaking!! I desperately wanted to tell him about chicken and biscuits but I knew he wouldn't understand!

I've decided I'm giving myself this one last month to just be sad if I want, but yesterday was exactly 11 months and April 3rd will be exactly one year. After that I have to stop. I have to get it together and use my experience to help others. And when I get upset I'll always have chicken and biscuits and Wally Ringwold.