I know there has to be other people have the same moments I do. Where you sit and think about what is going on in other people's lives. People on the other side of Earth. Not in depth or anything but sometimes you try to humble yourself by thinking about what other people might be enduring right at this second. Sometimes I feel like May Boatright from The Secret Life of Bees, like I carry the weight of the world's sorrows on my shoulders. Not quite like she does obviously but usually only for a couple minutes my heart breaks for people that feel pain over real things. Not the silly things that we complain about that, at the end of the day, don't matter. I feel like it puts my own petty problems in prospective.
I think we get so caught up in our everyday routine that we forget how easy some of us have it. Compare your problem to your possible problem. Sometimes I feel like grabbing people by the shoulders and shaking them as hard as I possibly can. I have a co-worker that complains about the most ridiculous things. I want to record her and play it back for her. I don't know whether to feel sorry for people like this or envy them. There are 1 of 2 things that is causing her to carry on like she does:
- Her life is so terrible outside the job that she just complains about everything. Or...
- Her life is cake and she's looking for the most petty things in life to complain about.
For her sake I hope it's number 2. Those kind of people get under my skin and I really truly hope that they don't have to experience anything in their lives that they should really be complaining about. How would they handle it? If she goes on and on and on and cries about computer paper and why it was moved and how stupid of an idea it was to move it for days and weeks, how will she react when something really horrible happens?
Sometimes I really sit and think about what a woman my age in Pakistan is going through. What is she doing right at this second? Or the 12 year old child that was sold into sex slavery. The mother that just lost her only daughter. The father that held his dying son in his arms. The woman that's lost her whole family in a car accident. It's amazing to me that we have people who complain about printer paper. Seriously.
A lot of times I think about what a woman who is at the same stage of life as I am who is just finding out that her father or mother are dying of a serious disease. When I think about it I feel that same hurt they do. Sometimes I wish I could endure it for them because I've already been there and am currently enduring the pain so why not do it for them too? I want to be able to tell this woman what to do, tell her the things I didn't know. What if her father isn't as resilient as mine was in the face of a horrible disease? What if she can't find strength within him? What if he is as resilient as my father was and she doesn't know just how serious it is? She'll never know you can't make up for lost time.
I think about these things a lot now, not so much that I'm moping around carrying the sorrows of everyone on my shoulders all the time. I do however remind myself that I am not the only one who has suffered something horrible. Others have suffered far worse and hey get back up. They smile. They go on to do great things and would never complain about printer paper. I also know that I can't change others, I can only change myself; my actions; my complaints. I know that somewhere over the rainbow people are enduring pain and suffering and making it though. I am not alone.
Maybe these people know the same that I do. Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly.....
My inspiration. The man that taught me, no matter what this life brings you NEVER give up. Don't waste time feeling sorry for yourself for the hand you've been dealt and handle everything you endure with your head held high and a smile on your face. This is made me who I am.
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